Forrest Wayne Ross died on Thursday, September 16, 2021, in his home in Raleigh, NC. He had just celebrated his 79th birthday.
Dad had been sick for about three years, but we hoped he would beat the cancer that was making him weak and stealing his youthful good looks and fun-loving personality. Just like everyone else who has terminal cancer there's a point where things start to change: a treatment takes a toll, appetite fades, a bout of dehydration, a urinary tract infection. Things get better and then it all starts again. Hospital, home, hospital, home. For us it was the beginning of the end, but we didn't realize it.
A fall at the beginning of September set the ball rolling one last time: concerned looks from doctors, a mention of the word hospice, and an ambulance ride home. My dad wouldn't eat, he wouldn't talk, he just slept. I drove down to Raleigh to be with Dad and my stepmother Sandy. I called my sisters so they could make plans to see him before he passed.
My dad was unresponsive when everyone arrived. Then, one evening he woke up and asked to make a phone call to his cousin Glenn. Even though it was late, we called Glenn and the two of them talked about football, reminisced, and exchanged "I love yous."
Dad got out of bed, took his rightful place in his Lazy-Boy in the living room, and watched some football. He talked to everyone (about 15 family members who invaded the house), he ate a little and drank. He micromanaged the preparation of a batch of vegetable soup, helped my daughter Kate set up a camera and tripod for a group photo, and played with his dog Molly. The hospice nurse had said he might rally one last time, but we hoped this was more than a rally. We hoped this was a miracle, and he would get better and live forever. After all, this burst of energy lasted four days!
Little did we know, this was a miracle of a different sort. It was a miracle that gave us time and peace. A miracle that allowed all of his daughters, stepchildren, and some of his grandchildren to spend quality time with him; to hold his hand. This "rally" felt a lot like one of our big family beach vacations without the beach: there was a lot of food, laughing, picture taking, and love.
My sister Morgan, Kate, and I were the first ones to leave - we had to return to jobs and family obligations. My sister Taylor left a couple of days later. My sister Kelly, who was staying with Dad and Sandy, said it all changed after we left. Once the house was quiet, he went to bed for the last time. I'm not sure if it was the next day (I think it was), but it was early in the morning when he passed away. Sandy, Kelly, and my stepsister Amanda were by his side. It was peaceful; it was final.
It's been almost three months since he passed. There is so much more to my father than the story of his death, but this is the only one that matters right now. After we get through this first Christmas without him, I will write some more. For now, the story of our little miracle will have to do.
Here is my father's obituary:
Forrest Wayne Ross, 79, of Raleigh, North Carolina, formerly of Clarksville, died Thursday, September 16, 2021, in his home following a lengthy illness.
He was born August 13, 1942, to Forest Vance and Ruth Brown Ross, in the family home in Clarksville, Pennsylvania.
He was a 1960 graduate of Jefferson-Morgan High School and a 1964 graduate of Waynesburg College.
Mr. Ross was a member of the Clarksville Christian Church in Clarksville.
He was employed by Aeronautical Chart and Information Center (A.C.I.C.) in St. Louis, Missouri, the National Security Agency (NSA) in Fort Meade, Maryland, and later as a rural mail carrier for the U.S. Postal Service.
After his retirement, he and Sandy owned and operated F. W. Bean Coffee.
On April 4, 1998, he married Sandy Fadness in Raleigh, North Carolina.
He is also survived by four daughters, Randi Ross Marodi (Tim) of Bentleyville, Kelly Lynn Ross of Raleigh, North Carolina, Morgan Ross Muhly (Jim) of St. Clairsville, Ohio, and Taylor Ross Callegari (Chris) of Olympia, Washington, three step-children Katrina Taylor (Matt) of Wake Forest, North Carolina, Matt Kraus (Brianna) of Fuquay-Varina, North Carolina, and Amanda Moss (Jonathan) of Wilmington, North Carolina; a sister Janet Ross Brown of The Villages, Florida; 15 grandchildren, Abigail Lee Marodi, Katherine Ruth Marodi, James Arthur Bertram Muhly Jr., Oliver Morgan Muhly, Benjamin Vance Muhly, Hazel Elizabeth Muhly, Theodore Robert Francis Muhly, Lola Jane Callegari, Isla Josephine Callegari, Rowan Christopher Callegari, Mackenzie Marie Taylor, Alexander Richard Kraus, William Vincent Kraus, Mary Kathryn Moss and Levi Jonathan Moss, and several nieces and nephews.
He is preceded in death by his brother Kenneth Isaac Ross.
Wayne loved dogs, and owned many during his lifetime, and will be missed by his faithful companion Molly.
Friends will be received at 1 p.m. Sunday, September 26, 2021, at Drexel Hall of Saint Katharine Parish, 208 Abromaitis Street, Bentleyville, followed by a memorial service at 2 p.m., with Jonathan Moss officiating.
In honor of Wayne’s love of Pittsburgh sports, guests are encouraged to wear black and gold or Pittsburgh team apparel.
Wayne was thankful for the Pfizer, Moderna and the Johnson & Johnson vaccines, as this made it possible for him to enjoy quality time with his family during the last months of his life. The family requests that those attending the visitation and services wear a mask.
In lieu of flowers, the family suggests that donations may be made to Wake County Animal Center, 820 Beacon Lane Drive, Raleigh, NC 27610 or Bridge to Home Animal Rescue, P.O. Box 985, McMurray, PA 15317.
Private burial will be in Greene County Memorial Park, Waynesburg.
Arrangements under the care of his son-in-law Tim Marodi at the Thompson-Marodi Funeral Home, Inc., 809 Main Street, Bentleyville, Pennsylvania 15314.
by Randi Ross Marodi / randileeross@gmail.com
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